Scout Road Schoolhouse: Why You Are the Way You Are

The Birth Order Book
“Why You Are the Way You Are”

by Dr. Kevin Leman

I’ve worked through this book over the last month or so. It’s a book you can easily pick up after not reading for a few days. I grabbed it off the shelf of the Christian book store on a whim because the concept of birth order is intriguing to me. Does the sibling order you are born into affect your personality? Also, I thought this book might give me insight into the “middle child” syndrome that I’ve heard about and would like to avoid in our own family.

Dr. Leman gives ample illustrations and evidence for why you “might” be the way you are. Of course, the birth order you’re born into doesn’t spell out exactly the type of person you’ll become. It is a fun read, though, to project onto your own background and the future of your kids.

As for the middle child, even Dr. Leman says they are the most difficult child on which to pinpoint any traits. It’s hard to tell whether they will be more of themselves and cause friction because they are trying to stand out amongst siblings or if they will fall back and be comfortable in the background.

Dr. Leman reinforced several ideas we already practice, or that I’d heard of in other families for treating each child as individuals: take children on dates alone with both parents, spend individual time with each child around the house on projects and games, and reinforce the “team” mentality that we’re all in this together!

If you don’t have time to read the book (you can borrow my copy if you’d like!)…here is a quick glance at

The 6 Keys to Birth Order:

1. Birth order is only an influence.

2. Parental treatment is as important as birth order.

3. Every birth order has strengths and weaknesses.

4. No birth order is more desirable than another.

5. Birth order indicators must be combined with others to form a bigger picture.
6. Understanding basic birth order principles is not a formula for problem solving.

Oldest: another tooth bites the dust